The Milton Report: 3/16/14

Having failed to reach the playoffs in the 2012 Austin Fall Cup, the Honey Badgers took the title for “Most Impressive Facial Hair” of the tournament.

In a burst of Carl Lewis-like speed, Adam blew by the field in this week’s installment of post-match drunken races. He even had enough energy for a victory lap while his opponents lay face down in the grass. Perhaps next week’s race will involve the entire Honey Badgers and Dragons squads.

In an effort to heal his never ending list of injuries, BT missed the game to make a special pilgrimage to San Diego where he met personally with His Eminence, the Honey Badger!  Although the meeting was discreet and private, undisclosed west coast CRU sources revealed that Brian received a full body blessing and a…